Being Married to a Bodybuilder

It’s been three long, challenging, exciting, and incredibly rewarding years since I started my journey as a bodybuilder.

There have definitely been highs and lows, but from my perspective, it has mostly been one big high. I’ve learned what my body is capable of. I’ve pushed myself mentally and physically. I’ve stepped on stages I never imagined I would stand on, earned medals, celebrated wins, and grown in ways that have gone far beyond bodybuilding.

But there’s another side of this journey that I don’t talk about as much.

What is it like being married to a bodybuilder?

And I realized that I’m probably not the best person to answer that question.

So, for this blog, I decided to ask the person who sees all of it; the good, the bad, and the ugly—my husband, Joseph.

Now, if you know Joseph, you know he’s not exactly the talkative type. 😂 But what he will do is tell it like it is. He has absolutely no shame in his game when it comes to giving me honest feedback, and that’s one of the things I love about him…even when I don’t necessarily want the feedback in that particular moment.

I queued up a few questions, sat him down in a hot inferred sauna, and asked him to give me his perspective on what the last three years have really been like.

So, let’s jump into it.

“What did you think when I told you I wanted to start bodybuilding?”

Joseph:

“I was very excited and supportive. I knew how important fitness was to you, so I really had no reservations about it.”

I probably should have expected that answer.

Fitness has always been a part of our relationship. Long before bodybuilding, working out and being active were things we enjoyed doing together. There was never really a moment where fitness suddenly entered our marriage—it was already there.

Which led me to my next question.

“Did you think bodybuilding would change our lives—our time together, activities, outings, things like that?”

Joseph:

“No. We were already pretty fitness-oriented even before all of this. We always liked to work out and spend time doing fitness-related activities. I just felt like that time would now be spent doing things more targeted toward bodybuilding or helping you prepare. I don’t think it really changed the dynamic of our already fitness-centric relationship.”

I was actually a little surprised by this answer.

But then I thought about it, and he’s right.

One of our first dates was literally going to a park, running, and working out together.

So maybe bodybuilding didn’t change who we were. It just changed the intensity and purpose behind some of the things we were already doing.

“What has been the most rewarding or exciting part of watching your wife become a bodybuilder?”

Joseph:

“Watching you compete, work hard, achieve your goals, win medals, and get on the stage. And also seeing our son being really proud of seeing you on stage. It definitely makes a big impact on him, so it’s really cool to see the effect that it has on our son.”

This answer hit differently.

As competitors, we can become so consumed with the next goal.

The next show.

The next prep.

The next improvement.

The next package we want to bring to the stage.

Sometimes we don’t realize who is watching us along the way.

Knowing that our son sees his mom work toward something difficult, stay committed, step on stage, and accomplish her goals makes every early morning, every cardio session, every meal-prepped container, and every hard day worth it.

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He isn’t just watching bodybuilding.

He’s watching discipline. He’s watching commitment. He’s watching his mom chase something that matters to her.

And I hope that lesson stays with him long after I step off my last bodybuilding stage.

“What has been the hardest part about being married to a bodybuilder?”

Joseph didn’t hesitate on this one.

Joseph:

“Being disciplined with the meal plan. It does affect the family, family outings, and going out to eat. You have to prepare for sometimes having separate food. Even if you’re used to eating together as a family, that might look a little different because depending on what the macro target is for that week, eating the same thing might not be a possibility.”

And THIS is probably one of the biggest realities of bodybuilding that people outside of the sport don’t see.

They see the stage.

They see the bikini.

They see the tan, hair, makeup, muscles, medals, and pictures.

What they don’t always see is the lifestyle required to get there.

Food is such a huge part of family life. Date nights. Birthdays. Holidays. Vacations. Sunday dinners. Random “let’s grab something to eat” moments.

During prep, those things don’t necessarily disappear—but they can look very different.

Sometimes I’m bringing my own food.

Sometimes we’re eating different meals.

Sometimes we’re choosing a restaurant based on whether there is something I can reasonably eat.

Sometimes I’m sitting at the table with my family while everyone else is eating something I can’t have that week.

Bodybuilding may be an individual sport when I step on stage, but prep absolutely affects the household.

“What’s one thing you would change about bodybuilding?”

This answer made me laugh because apparently Joseph has some thoughts about bodybuilding shows from the spectator side. 😂

Joseph:

“The experience for spectators. I’ve told you before—they’re not very nice in the crowd. They’re very strict about things like videos, and sometimes it just doesn’t feel very welcoming.”

Fair enough!

Competitors experience shows from backstage. We’re pumping up, getting glazed, checking our suits, practicing poses, trying not to panic, and waiting for our number to be called.

Our families experience something completely different.

They’ve traveled with us, adjusted their schedules, sat through hours of competition, cheered, taken pictures, helped carry bags, dealt with our prep brains—and then they’re sitting in the audience trying to capture the moment.

It reminded me that bodybuilding isn’t only an experience for the athlete. Our support systems are part of the experience too.

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“What advice would you give someone whose spouse wants to become a bodybuilder?”

Joseph:

“The whole family has to be supportive of it. It’s going to be a lot of time at the gym and a lot of time being strict with a meal plan. It might take away from some old traditions, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s going to be like that forever.”

That might be my favorite answer of the entire conversation.

Because bodybuilding has seasons.

Prep is a season.

Improvement season is a season.

Competition day is one day.

And while pursuing a goal sometimes requires sacrifice, the goal shouldn’t be to lose yourself or your family in the process.

Some traditions might temporarily change. Date night might look different. Family dinner might look different. Vacations might require a little more planning. Your spouse might have to hear the phrase “I brought my food” more times than they ever imagined possible.

But different doesn’t automatically mean bad.

Sometimes you create new traditions along the way.

So…Would Joseph Ever Compete?

Of course I had to ask.

His answer wasn’t exactly a yes—but it wasn’t a hard no either. 👀

For Joseph, the workouts wouldn’t necessarily be the biggest challenge. Nutrition would be the deciding factor.

Joseph:

“If I were to do it, I would really have to find the nutrition plan that works for me. It’s not really about the workouts as much as it is my specific goals and finding a nutrition plan that works.”

So you’re saying there’s a chance? 😂

I’ll leave that one right there.

Bodybuilding May Be an Individual Sport, But It Isn’t an Individual Journey

Talking to Joseph reminded me of something important.

I may be the one standing on stage, but I didn’t get there alone.

There is a husband who has adjusted meals, schedules, outings, and family routines.

There is a little boy watching his mom chase big goals and proudly cheering from the audience.

There is a family experiencing the sacrifices and celebrations right alongside me.

And there is a partner who, three years later, continues to support something that matters deeply to me—even when it requires sacrifice from him too.

Being married to a bodybuilder requires patience, flexibility, communication, and a whole lot of support.

But being a bodybuilder with a supportive spouse?

That’s a blessing I don’t take for granted.

So, Joseph, thank you for eating your food while I eat mine. Thank you for understanding when “date night” has to fit my macros. Thank you for sitting through bodybuilding shows even though you apparently have some complaints for management. 😂 Thank you for being honest with me when I ask for feedback, even when I immediately regret asking.

And most importantly, thank you for showing our son what it looks like when two people support each other’s goals without losing sight of the family they’re building together.

Three years into this bodybuilding journey, I’ve collected some medals and learned a lot about myself.

But one of the biggest lessons might be this:

The person on the stage may get the medal, but there’s often an entire family behind that win.

And in our family, bodybuilding has become part of our story. The next chapter is our trip to Charlotte next month with I will compete in my first ever pro show. No matter the outcome, I will come out a winner because my family will be by my side to make more memories in a new city.

Mind. Body. Heart. Family. Get Uplifted. ❤️